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  • Music Friday: Toby Keith’s Wife Won’t Settle for Anything Less Than a ‘Christmas Rock’
 
Howard
Friday, 13 December 2019 / Published in Uncategorized

Music Friday: Toby Keith’s Wife Won’t Settle for Anything Less Than a ‘Christmas Rock’

Welcome to a special holiday edition of Music Friday. Today, a cash-strapped Toby Keith reluctantly agrees to visit his local jeweler in the comical 1995 release, “Christmas Rock.”

In the song, we learn that Keith’s wife has been spending a lot of time looking at jewelry catalogs. She knows what she wants for Christmas, and practical, household items, such as pots and pans or a long nightshirt, are not going to cut it this year. She wants “something shinin’ on her hand” and it had better be a diamond or an emerald.

Keith tries to plead his case: They’re on a strict budget and they have to keep their spending down. Her reaction: She sheds a “big ol’ tear.”

The man who complains that his “billfold doesn’t have a prayer” finds himself en route to his local jeweler.

He sings, “Down to the jewelry store, here I go / Hear the clerk say, “Ho, ho, ho” / She wants a Christmas rock / But Santa’s pockets ain’t got no roll.”

Ironically, 18 years after the song was released, Keith appeared on the cover of Forbes magazine under the headline “Country Music’s $500 Million Man.”

“Christmas Rock” appeared as the third track from his first holiday album, Christmas To Christmas. Over the course of his 26-year music career, Keith has produced 19 studio albums, two Christmas albums and five compilation albums, with worldwide sales of 40 million units. Sixty-one singles have hit the Billboard Hot Country songs list, including 20 chart toppers.

Born in Clinton, Okla, in 1961, Toby Keith Covel became interested in music as a youngster. His grandmother owned a supper club in Fort Smith, Ark., and the young boy would visit during the summers. Keith did odd jobs around the club and got to interact with the band members. He got is first guitar at the age of eight.

After graduating high school, Keith worked as a derrick hand in the oil fields, but also performed for $35 a night at local bars as the frontman for the Easy Money Band. The band played the honky tonk circuit in Oklahoma and Texas, but never made it big.

Nearing 30 years of age, Keith decided to move to Nashville to see if he could land a recording contract and fulfill his dreams of a career in the music business. He distributed demo tapes to record companies in the city, but there was no interest.

Keith’s luck changed when a flight attendant and fan gave one of his demo tapes to Harold Shedd, a Mercury Records executive. Shedd later saw Keith perform live and quickly signed him to a record deal.

Since 2002, the singer, songwriter, actor and record producer has made numerous trips to the Middle East to support and entertain the U.S. men and women serving near the front lines.

Please check out the audio track of Keith performing “Christmas Rock.” The lyrics are below if you’d like to sing along…

“Christmas Rock”
Written by Lewis Anderson. Performed by Toby Keith.

My billfold doesn’t have a prayer
There’s Christmas catalogs everywhere
She keeps looking at the jewelry section
Cutting pictures out of her selections

I said, “We need to hold it down this year”
And in her eye she got a big ol’ tear
She wants a Christmas rock
But Santa’s pockets ain’t got no roll

She don’t want pots and pans
Just something shinin’ on her hand
With an emerald or a diamond on it
I had a budget but she’s gone and blown it

Down to the jewelry store, here I go
Hear the clerk say, “Ho, ho, ho”
She wants a Christmas rock
But Santa’s pockets ain’t got no roll

She don’t want anything from Sears
No tools or garden shears
There’s something special on her mind
And I can’t even afford the shine

I wish she’d settled for a long nightshirt
No, I’ve got to give till it hurts
She wants a Christmas rock
But Santa’s pockets ain’t got no roll

She don’t want pots and pans
Just something shinin’ on her hand
With an emerald or a diamond on it
I had a budget but she’s gone and blown it

Down to the jewelry store, here I go
Hear the clerk say, “Ho, ho, ho”
She wants a Christmas rock
But Santa’s pockets ain’t got no roll

She wants a Christmas rock
But ol’ Santa’s pockets ain’t got no roll

Credit: Photo by Spc. Aaron Rosencrans [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

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